Legal vs Moral

My morning started with Mister waking me up to inform me that Son#3's cell phone was beeping this morning (because he is on restriction and lost the privilege of having his phone with him). Mister checked it out only to discover a barrage of text messages and voicemails from the wee hours of the morning. Son#3 was back on the sex lines and trying to set up a meeting with another prostitute. 

Of course this is also not helpful for Mister's sobriety. He will leave for work and that drive will take him directly through the spaces and places where Mister has typically been one of the "Joe's" in that portion of the world that I would prefer to forget it even exists. I choose not to stress over it (and find myself practicing my relaxation breathing just typing about it). Instead, I go through my morning routine, including saying my prayers and trying to relinquish control to the Lord.

Next up in my morning is getting to prod Son#3 awake and get him motivated for the morning since he has an appointment with his psychologist. Now, it is very difficult in my area to find a qualified therapist that specializes in porn/sex addiction recovery. This is his second visit with this particular therapist and the first time Mister was the one that accompanied Son#3 for the visit.

The psychologist asks to visit with me first and asks what has been happening with Son#3. I detail the events in the last 24 hours and then I am surprised by the reaction I receive. I get a lecture about Son#3 being 18 years old and that he has done nothing illegal. (Point of information: If I am not mistaken, soliciting a prostitute is, in fact, illegal.) My personal moral preferences may not align with his choices, but that doesn't make them actually wrong. He has a right to sexual feelings and expression of those feelings within the bounds of the law. Furthermore, I am told that I am not qualified to make the determination that Son#3 has a porn addiction.

So, based on all of this.... 

YOU'RE FIRED!

This doesn't really help things with Son#3 who is now convinced that I am nothing but a religious freak and an abusive parent for trying to squelch his sexuality. Can this day get worse? (Please don't answer that.)

"The societies in which many of us live have for more than a generation failed to foster moral discipline. They have taught that truth is relative and that everyone decides for himself or herself what is right. Concepts such as sin and wrong have been condemned as 'value judgments.' As the Lord describes it, 'Every man walketh in his own way, and after the image of his own god' (D&C 1:16).

"As a consequence, self-discipline has eroded and societies are left to try to maintain order and civility by compulsion. The lack of internal control by individuals breeds external control by governments" (Moral Discipline, D. Todd Christofferson Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, October 2009).

“Policemen and laws can never replace customs, traditions and moral values as a means for regulating human behavior. At best, the police and criminal justice system are the last desperate line of defense for a civilized society. Our increased reliance on laws to regulate behavior is a measure of how uncivilized we’ve become” (Walter Williams, “Laws Are a Poor Substitute for Common Decency, Moral Values,” Deseret News, Apr. 29, 2009, A15).

“There is a great risk in justifying what we do individually and professionally on the basis of what is ‘legal’ rather than what is ‘right.’ In so doing, we put our very souls at risk. The philosophy that what is legal is also right will rob us of what is highest and best in our nature. What conduct is actually legal is, in many instances, way below the standards of a civilized society and light years below the teachings of the Christ. If you accept what is legal as your standard of personal or professional conduct, you will deny yourself of that which is truly noble in your personal dignity and worth” (President James E. Faust, “Be Healers,” Clark Memorandum, spring 2003, 3).